Accident in the House

Hey, y’all, it’s Chi-ping. Do you like that? I learned y’all in New Orleans, sounded so colorful. I’m colorful, so I use it.


The neighbors here aren’t as friendly as I remembered them; not bad, but not so welcoming, as I thought they would.

When I come running toward her, she yells, “Good girl, yeah!” I show off and run even faster, if it’s possible up hill. She gets excited easily.

Honestly, I try not to shit and pee in the house, but sometimes it just happens. Like last night, there I was pushing out the last nugget, when I realized I’m in the house. I let out a whimper so loud. She hopped out of bed. I ran to the door to get the hell away from the poop. I skid through a puddle, oh, no, here she comes. I got really small. It was dark, maybe, she didn’t see me. I crept close to the wall, bam, back in bed before she turned the light on.

She picked me up kindly enough, but I could feel that she was peeved. It’s funny how you just know these things. Tucked under her arm, without a chance to protest, still so stunned this wasn’t just another dream, shit, I was hoping to wake up and still be in the bed.

Next thing you know I am standing on the carport and the light goes off. The only comfort I got was from Blondie, who was bouncing in front of me to go check out the new dog at my old digs. Blondie must be over her fear of going out at night. She’s all ready to go. Me, I just shit and peed. I’m ready to go back to sleep.